Last Updated on January 27, 2025
Optimism in dark times
In the United States, we recently inaugurated a comically evil fascist to his second term as president.
On Day 1, he signed a confusing blizzard of executive orders designed to make our nation less inclusive, less kind, and less equitable.
In dark times like this, it is easy to succumb to despair and hopelessness.
And I’ve certainly felt such feelings arise in me too.
But recently I’ve been more optimistic than ever.
We’ve already overcome this
Yesterday I came across an Instagram reel from a man named Jamyle Cannon who made a good point.
He said “everything we’re about to face, we’ve already overcome.”
If we did it once, we can do it again!
Jamyle went on to state that past generations of civil rights leaders not only overcame incredible odds to create a better world for all.
They also did so without being shocked and outraged by everything that the people in power did.
How did they do this?
They had a strong, positive vision for the future.
And they kept their eyes on the prize.
Rather than being thrown off by the latest news or setback, they kept their focus on what they wanted instead.
Knowing what you want
This is something we talk about a lot in hypnosis and Neuro-Linguistic Programming too.
If you ask someone what they want for their birthday and they say…
- “I don’t want any clothes, I have too many already”
- “And no books please, I just don’t have time to read”
- “And definitely no gift cards”
You still have no idea what they want!
If you tell Siri to give you directions, but not to New York City, and definitely not Boston, it will still have no idea where to direct you.
It’s OK to start with what you don’t want.
Often that is the most obvious.
But if you actually want to create a better life or a better world, then it’s helpful to ask, “And what do you want instead of that?”
Once you know what you want, focus on that.
Let go of everything that’s not what you want.
And keep your eyes on the prize.
From fear to love
When we are stressed, we often don’t know what we want.
We can get so focused on the danger that we end up disconnected from our desires, from what would bring us joy and happiness.
This is why it’s so important to transform the stress response in the nervous system.
To interrupt it, so that we can get unstuck and back into the flow.
When we do interrupt the pattern of fear though, we naturally find ourselves in the experience of love.
We reconnect with what we love to do, and with our connections with other human beings.
And the world starts to feel like a safe place again.
Leading with love
I believe that the forces of fear that aim to control and dominate are doing so out of a misguided attempt at love.
As humans, we can become confused about how to get our needs met.
We all sometimes fall for the illusion that the only or best way to motivate ourselves and others is through fear and pain.
We can do it that way.
But luckily, there is a far better way.
We can motivate ourselves and others through love and joy.
This not only feels better, it also works better.
In other words, we can move from The Punishment Paradigm to The Progress Paradigm.
Leaders who motivate through fear only get compliance when their followers are being watched.
And they end up motivating strong resistance movements.
Whereas leaders who motivate through joy and love create movements of mutual support that operate long after the leader is gone.
We are all leaders of ourselves, and can step into leadership with the people around us.
The first step is to allow yourself to envision a better future, to connect with what you really, really want.
Luckily, this is a skill anyone can cultivate more and more.
That’s why I’m optimistic that you can become more optimistic too. 😊
Take care,
~Duff
(they/them)
P.S. If you want to become more optimistic, and move from The Punishment Paradigm to The Progress Paradigm, you might enjoy my weekly coaching group The Joy of Doing.
