Last Updated on June 10, 2024

It’s OK to feel good

I recently finished teaching my Transforming Money Fears Masterclass (available now as an on-demand product).

In the class, I taught The 3 Keys to Transforming Stress:

  1. Deep relaxation. 15-20 minutes a day is great.
  2. Transform triggers. This is where hypnosis and NLP excel.
  3. Do courageous things. Be bold and expand your comfort zone!

Often people do just one of these.

But I’ve found that doing all three together works the best.

Deep Relaxation Feels Great

Importantly, deep relaxation doesn’t mean watching TV, playing video games, exercising, or socializing.

These are fine things to do.

But what I mean is deeply relaxing your nervous system.

Like with my Extreme Relaxation hypnosis on YouTube.

The idea is to chill the fuck out, to enter a relaxing “trophotropic” trance state.

When you truly relax your nervous system, it feels amazing.

It’s like you just got a full-body massage.

Or just sat in a hot tub.

Your muscles are relaxed.

You feel calm and peaceful.

You might even feel euphoric.

Whether you get there through hypnosis, meditation, slow breathing, yoga, qigong, or something else doesn’t really matter.

The end goal is the same: feeling wonderful!

Is it OK to Feel Good?

In class mentioned that sometimes I’ll do even more than 20 minutes a day of deep relaxation practice.

When I’m experiencing more stress, I’ll bump it up to an hour or two a day.

For instance, last week I did 307 minutes (yes, I’m a nerd, I keep track).

One person in class asked a fantastic question:

“How do you get over feeling like it’s not OK to take an hour or two a day to do deep relaxation practice?”

To be honest, I struggle with this too!

We live in such weird times.

In the US at least, we are both a highly hedonistic consumerist society and there’s this message that it’s not OK to feel good!

If you say you watch 4 hours of television a day, no one would think that’s odd.

That’s about the average Americans watch TV daily.

But if you say you take 2 hours a day to just feel good for no reason, people would certainly raise an eyebrow.

Beyond the Goal of Normal

I think the first step is to realize that “normal” is not our goal.

It’s “normal” to feel bad most of the time.

And if you’re already a neurodivergent weirdo like me, you’re never gonna get to “normal” anyway!

The second thing to realize is we don’t cultivate positive states only for ourselves.

When I’m relaxed and happy, I’m more kind to others.

And having a chill system (instead of a “nervous system”) helps people around me to chill their system too, through what’s called “co-regulation.”

So being chill helps me be a better coach, partner, and friend.

Imagine if everyone around you was calm and compassionate!

That would certainly make the world a better place.

Take care,

 

 

 

~Duff
(they/them)

P.S. Here’s what one participant in my Transforming Money Fears Masterclass had to say about it:

“I’m really glad I joined your class! Thank you for everything. When I was watching the replay of the first day, I was thinking ‘hell yeah – this resonates so much more than Manifestation Babe.’ HAHA!

“The thought came into my mind because she was doing her ‘Sovereign Money’ launch about that time and posting all these things about being a money queen and ‘dripping with money’ stuff.

“To me, it’s really helpful to have conversations and trainings around money mindset that are not centered around ego based desires and 100K months.

“Everyone has different goals when it comes to their finances, and I’d much rather chat about it with someone who I can relate to as a human….because for the most part, we live ordinary lives that don’t include monthly 1st class international travel, designer clothing, etc. Sooo…keep going!”

Get the replays for only $77.