Childhood sucked. We creative kids were labeled “gifted and talented” which meant we not only were forced to do our normal boring homework but also the special homework for the creative kids. And yet we also had real limitations, perhaps problems reading, focusing, learning social skills, doing math, or coordinating our limbs in gym class, adding a hidden burden on top of disability.
As a result we created an internal taskmaster that forces us to do shit we hate, pushing ourselves to the max, while also creating an internal rebel that refuses to do anything at all, to “stick it to the man.”
We turn our passion projects into “have to’s” and then don’t want to do them, escaping into fantasy worlds of video games and social media, or going down research rabbit holes on Wikipedia and YouTube.
We feel like we don’t know enough to start, even though the very nature of starting a creative project is that you literally cannot know anything until you start! So we research endlessly, leading to analysis paralysis and making it impossible to decide. But hey, at least we can impress people at parties with trivia we’ve collected!